The View’s Descent into Chaos: A Hostage Situation, White Supremacy, and a Million MAGA Supporters on the Move

THIS is the new and improved culture of America.

The sisters of The View are starting to whine about the overload of illegal aliens in New York.

One of sisters, herself a Cuban migrant, cites the stress and strain the Cuban boat people piled on Miami in the 1980s. JOy Behar tries to pawn off the whole "problem" on climate change. Sure, Joy, there was never a drought in Africa until last year.

It is quite lovely.

They love open borders until they see the sullen eyes staring at them where they live.

Naturally, I'm eager for an upgrade.

I suggest accommodating a small group of undocumented immigrants within the studio premises, where the show is recorded. They can be seated among the live audience and also participate in the production process, blending in with the supportive community of sisters.

Walking, sitting, sleeping, washing, eating, talking, for starters. Then we see what develops.

Pardon me, sir! Our intention is to perform a show here! Are you able to communicate in English? It would be greatly appreciated if we could have a translator present. Kindly remove your hand from my shoulder! This dress is valued at five thousand dollars! This constitutes mistreatment! Physical attack! This individual is touching my skin! I, too, support the Me Too movement! This relates to a matter of mental well-being! Requesting assistance from security personnel!

You know, that kind of thing. And please, keep the cameras rolling. If you want ratings you can only dream of.

We're excited to have New York Mayor Eric Adams on the show today. It looks like he's getting a little too comfortable, though! He's crawling under the table and causing quite a scene. I can't believe this is happening!"

Liberal women across America seemed to be shocked to discover the US government isn't just importing nuclear physicists and leading international chess players.

According to CNN, during the latest episode of The View, there was yet another occurence of excrement being found on the floor. The New York Health Department responded by dispatching a specialized team equipped to deal with biohazardous materials for the cleanup process.

CBS: "We are live outside the ABC Studios on 66th Street, where a hostage situation appears to be developing. Details are sketchy at this time. The FBI and Homeland Security are on the scene. We're told the event unfolded when three immigrants temporarily living on the set of The View tried to steal a large $150,000 camera. Security intervened, and the broadcast of the show, which was ongoing, went dark. Just a moment ... we're now getting word that Homeland Security Secretary, Alejandro Mayorkas, who was scheduled to appear on The View, and canceled at the last minute, may in fact be trapped inside the ABC Studios. And President Biden is about to address the nation. An anonymous White House Source is telling CBS News Mr. Biden has an update on the crisis. The hostage situation may be an operation launched by a White Supremacy terrorist organization headquartered in Mississippi. Stay with us. The situation is very fluid at this time ..."

NBC: "Senator Schumer, can you tell us anything about the white terrorists?"

SCHUMER: "I've just had a conversation with Attorney General Garland, and he believes the situation is dire. He's compared it to the January 6th attack on the Capitol and the bombing of Pearl Harbor. As a result, Donald Trump is being transported to the ADX Supermax prison in Fremont, Colorado. I've also received a message from Joy Behar, who is being held captive by white individuals."

NBC: "Excuse the interruption, Senator, but we need to switch to the White House now, where President Biden is speaking live."

BIDEN: "I must say, I've never seen a situation like this before, not even when my students at the University of Pennsylvania were taken hostage by ... well, there's a similar trend here that we need to consider. Jill told me about it last night. It seems that nearly a million MAGA supporters are attempting to enter Nigeria and make it their new home. They're drawn by cheaper housing and a desire to purchase land and displace the native population. Unbelievable, right? I just spoke with the President of Nigeria, and he's decided to close his country's border. That's a bold move, but it means we'll be dealing with a large number of angry white people returning to the US. Who knows what they might do? We need to be prepared. I've just contacted the 82nd Airborne ..."

NOW The View has some serious ratings. NOW women all over America are riveted because their repressed fears of migrants pouring into the US are being addressed-- albeit with lies about white terrorists taking over the show. That doesn't matter. What matters is Joy Behar is terrified because some migrant is crawling under the table feeling her leg. What matters is the women of The View are screaming. ATTACK THE SONS OF BITCHES. ARREST THEM.

The show has officially begun.

Experiencing reality for the very first instance.

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