Getting older does come with a positive aspect - accumulated experience. Therefore, I am here to share my extensive knowledge with you. Despite my girlfriend insisting that I clean the pool, I will still provide you with the list.
1. If you do anything that gets your hands wet, soapy or dirty, your nose WILL itch.
2. When you give your email out anywhere on the internet, you will soon learn all you never wanted to know about body part enhancements.
3. A cat's affection is not unconditional. It expects you to earn its approval through consistent displays of devotion, such as regular petting, feeding, and litter box maintenance. Failure to meet these expectations may result in the cat's dismissal of you from its life.
4. Your Co-Workers, on the other hand, DO love you ... at least as long as you continue to give them good stuff to talk about when you aren't around.
5. You are NOT the master of your fate. Your mother is. And when you get married, your wife is.
Life has its ups and downs, alternating between moments of beauty and difficulty. This cycle may continue indefinitely.
7. There is a chip in all cars that keeps them from starting unless you stroke the dashboard correctly and sincerely mean it when you say "Come on baby. you can do it".
8. The efficiency of computers is inversely proportional to their importance in a given situation.
9. A kiss is just a kiss, and a smile is just a smile, but a baby is forever.
10. There is no such thing as a ghost that can haunt you ... except in your own mind.
11. Nothing is carved in stone ... other than what will happen if you forget your other half's birthday or anniversary.
12. No matter how hard you try, you will NEVER be able to fold laundry according to your spouse's instructions.
13. Anything you think will happen, won't ... and anything you think won't happen, will.
Love requires mutual effort and communication in both directions, unless the relationship is compared to a freeway where there could be numerous detours before reaching a destination.
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